Creative Expression

I've noticed how many people publish memoirs after profound loss and I've been thinking a lot about why. Even those who have never really written before write about the experience and on the surface, it can seem like a way to help others. And, it is. But another reason is that we need to have a creative outlet.

After loss, we have the need and the opportunity to express the roiling emotions in ways we never have, and we can do so without feeling the pressure to be perfect. When I wrote my book, I wasn't worried about criticism because I thought it takes a special kind of jerk to critique a book about losing my husband and our dog. Releasing that fear allowed everything to come out, a much-needed purge after having had to just buck up and deal with everything that happened.

This is a pretty common response. We might feel like broken records after a while when we talk to friends and family about how we're feeling. I felt like I was just misery on repeat and I couldn't stand to hear myself talk about it anymore. But that didn't mean my feelings had dissipated - if anything, I needed an outlet even more because it seemed there was nowhere left to go.

I've been an avid journal keeper for as long as I can remember so writing a memoir probably wasn't a leap for me. But, I also felt the need to be surrounded by creativity and I dove into as many museums and music performances as I could find when I traveled. Doing so helped bring me out of myself for a bit while serving as inspiration for future projects.

We live in a society that provides very little room for creative expression. If we are interested in writing, people are more than willing to stress that "real" writers only do x, y, or z. If we're interested in painting, we might be discouraged by our lack of expertise. But isn't the whole point of any creative expression simply to express? I can't think of a more necessary time to do so than after profound loss.

So, write that book, even if you have no intention of publishing it. Take those art classes. Sing at the top of your lungs. Get it out. It's part of becoming who you will be.